30.

This weekend I'm working to get the word out about my 30th High School Reunion. Pictured are:
 - the boy I grew up talking about God with
 - the girl I wanted to be in High School
- the boy I considered a friend who died at too young an age and I dont know why... it seems like I should
- the girl who thanked me in her senior section for being her friend who I've totally lost touch with
- the boy who gave me my first kiss

 I'm all over the board on this reunion thing. I've never been before. Honestly had no desire to go before.But a friend is leading the reunion planning and I told her I'd help with social media.
 I also remember my dad telling me that at the 30th it's nice because people have mostly settled into their own skin and stop trying to be something and just be themselves.

I've posted all our year book photos on facebook and I loved an exchange I had yesterday with one girl. I commented that she was beautiful and her reply was...

Thank you, I was (beautiful) and I didn't even know it.

That kind of sums up what I'm hoping for with the reunion... that somehow spending a few hours together will help us realize more who we really are. Not who we, or others, thought we were in high school. I sure hope so.

Marshmallows

"It's a memory that's actually more like a photograph"

A gentlemen I met with at work yesterday used that line. And I like it. I had one of those last week. As Mike and I were leaving the house to go grab dinner one of our girls was standing at the door shouting out to us...something kookie. (I can't imagine what our neighbors think of us!) And in that moment my memory took one of those photos. I realized how unbelievably grateful I am to still have my girls at home. This is not a "failure to launch" situation. They both made deliberate choices that kept them here. One wisely delayed school until she was ready for college and the work it would take. The other worked a year saving to earn money and the opportunity to live, learn and serve internationally for six months and she is now home and in school. Being home with your parents isn't very normal here. Seriously, who wants to hang out with the 'rents at their age... but they have somehow found a way to survive and thrive :). In that snapshot moment I was also profoundly aware of what our relationships would be like if we had been suburban "normal" and they had done what most kids do, in fact, what their brother did, and moved away for school at 18. I remember moving away at that age. And sometimes I feel frozen at that age, when I go home to visit my Mom. It's hard to stay connected at a distance. It just is. And, I feel like we have been granted these extra moments to grow together, to prop one another up, to challenge and frustrate one another in close proximity to look for our clothes in one another's rooms and to occasionally find marshmallows in my driveway. And, I'm so grateful.

Blame Jilly

My friend Jilly is an inspiring human. But let me start at the beginning of this chapter. I haven't blogged for nearly two years. I imagine that as I put my fingers back on these blogger keys i'll share some of the why. Truth is... I'm hoping that blogging again will help me discover just where I've been for two years too. Anyway... every once in a while I get a random comment from a stranger in a foreign country that reminds me that this blog still exists. Yesterday... when I got the notification I found myself thinking... I miss writing. Maybe I should do that again. So I thought i'd talk to God about that idea later. Then last night when I did my evening perusal of facebook I found that Jilly had posted on her facebook that she wished I still wrote. It was an affirmation of my wondering. There's so much in my life to thank Jilly for... she is a passionate woman who loves life and her family and people and food and God, and well me. She INSPIRES me to be more of who I am. So thanks Jilly for giving me the courage to come back here and stay a while.